Is it just me or is January the longest month of the year?
Like many, I started 2025 with a laundry list of (low-stakes) resolutions. Nothing radical. I stuck to things like, I’m going to try to take more beach walks and drink more water every day. It’s not that I wasn’t optimistic about the coming year. It’s just that I tempered that optimism with caution. 2024 threw some wild curveballs at our family and I’m still getting my feet back under me.
And then things got political, LA started to burn, and my elderly mother suffered from a series of unfortunate events that ultimately landed her (and me) in an overcrowded ER for 48 long, grueling hours, followed by a hospital stay.
Some people smoke, drink or binge eat when stressed. I, however, am a prolific stress knitter. How prolific? I’ve been known to give myself blisters. By now, my friends and family know the warning signs. When I start handing out beanies and scarves like party favors, something’s definitely wrong. Last week I knit five hats. Three of them on tiny little needles, just to slow myself down. Honestly, it was the only way to stay sane. Everywhere I turned, it seemed, was terrible news that I could do nothing about. Hats, on the other hand, I can fix. Worst case scenario, I frog the whole thing and start over.
I’m in awe of people who can work at hospitals, but I think there’s almost nowhere I’d like to be less than the ER. I get woozy at the sight of blood and my anxiety spirals with every beep of every monitor. What’s worse – I catch misery. I find myself experiencing empathy induced symptoms that have no sane explanation. Days later I still find myself holding my breath and clenching my fists. I still have to remind myself to breathe.
The irony, is that my three older siblings are all doctors. There were no healthcare worker genes left for me, apparently.
As of today my mom is still recovering. I’m constantly worried about her but we think the crisis has passed. She is stable again, staying at an excellent skilled nursing facility where she can get the therapy she needs to regain her strength. This is a massive relief for both of us and it means I can continue my work on The Witches Catalog of Wanderlust Essentials.
Fingers crossed that February is kinder to us!